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November/December 2004 “The
Slowest of Motion”
I remember it was sometime in August. It was a very sunny day--I should know, I saw it myself. The house cleaner always opened the shades every morning. “Good Morning!” she said, with a happy voice. I opened my eyes and the sun shone on me, flooding my body with brightness. It pierced my eyes as if two square-peg nails were hammered in my eyes in through my brain. I tried to yell, but the alarm clock beat me to it. The loud buzz sound jamming into my ears made it impossible for me to have such a “good morning.” “Good
morning, New York…” was the next thing I heard. I had a digital
television that turned on to the news every morning at nine. “Today’s
weather is top notch: blue skies and clean sunshine. Get ready to have
some fun. It’s one of those days you cannot deny happiness. In other
news…” As the happy and obviously overworked newscaster continued,
I walked into the shower. I wanted to enjoy my day so badly, so I thought
a warm scented shower would help me wake up in a good mood. After my “made-for-a-king” shower I went to the dining hall for some tea. I like to wake up to some great herbal tea. It tastes and feels good. They say that it calms your nerves and boy did I need my nerves calmed. After tea, I noticed that my wife was not in the abode. Usually, she had off on Tuesdays. I guessed that she had been called in, so I did not think much of it. Although I tried to ignore the questions in my mind, it still disturbed me all day. Therefore, I called her boss, who happens to be my best friend. He said that she was in and would be home soon. He told me that he had wanted to discuss some business with her for next week’s forum reports. Saying “Oh” as if I knew a darn thing about forum reports, I ended the call and left for a stroll around Central Park. I am no mind reader, but by now you are probably thinking to yourself that I am no normal man. Well, if you let me explain the not-so-normal part of me, you might be allured. I have a weird obsession of carving x’s over the pictures of my previous girlfriends and stuffing them into a knife box where I keep my tiger dagger. Every single girlfriend that I have ever had has cheated on me or has done something to break my heart. I had gotten sick of it all and settled with a wonderful woman. I knew she would never deceive me at all. She had a heart of platinum and a soul untouched by evil. I met her in a chat room on the Internet. I would always think to myself that if I found a great friend, maybe I would not need a girlfriend. She said that she had gone through the same pain and would never think of breaking someone’s heart in any way. I liked her so much that I would have given everything I had to be with her. However, I did not want a lover: there was no more heart to break, tears had become blood. My brain shut down the loving department and erased the loner’s feeling out of my system. Something about her made me let down my guard and marry her. Back to my morning, after lunch I noticed she was not home yet, so I texted her cellular phone and asked her to come home. At six in the evening, she came home with a face full of sadness, as if she were looking at the corpse of her mother or something. I asked her where she had been and she began to gasp for air. She was facing the wall, and by the look of her body moving she was crying heavily. These gasps of air she took sounded as if she was underwater, desperate for air. “Please tell me what’s wrong, what happened?” She turned around slowly looking down at the floor. I saw her face; it was as red as a cherry, as wet as the ocean, the look of overwhelming sadness in her eyes. She said, “Tell me that you love me.” I responded, “I love you more than life itself. My love runs deeper than the depths of the ocean and you know that, what is…” “Until death do us part?” she interrupted. “Yes, yes! Please tell…” “Tell me nothing can come between us, that our love is beyond words and that nothing can break us apart,” she interrupted again. "Honey, you mean the world to me. When others have lied and broke my heart, you were the only one to restore me and make me stronger. You were the one who has helped me to love again, to live again.” As soon as I said this, she fell to the floor crawling towards me. “I had sex with my boss and I couldn’t help myself. I was out all day thinking of a way to tell you. Please forgive me!” The anger inside me was burning my organs and my skin; an internal hell that felt like it was overtaking my body. My stomach twisted and felt like it had just gone upside down. I felt my heart turn to ash and just disappear. With a smile on my face I looked at her and said, “Oh is that all?” I then skipped into my room singing “Mary Had a Little Lamb.” I took her picture and my dagger and sat on my trunk. She walked in. In a childish voice I said, “Look, baby, it’s your picture. You look so pretty, so happy. You have your little wedding dress on and a smile on your face. ‘The perfect woman,’ I always say. A perfect picture of a perfect woman. I cannot ruin this. I’ll just ruin you like you did me.” After I tied her up, I took my dagger and carved the letter “x” on her face. I took my time, humming the Wedding March. Each line took two minutes to complete. “Oh look at this, you’re not a perfect person on the inside so let’s show off the flaws on the outside.” I continued carving x’s all over her body, each one slower and deeper than the last. After the carving I decided to paint her. “You are truly a work of art,” I said to her. “I shall paint the blood black as coal. You don’t mind if I show the people what your heart really pumps do you?” The painting was complete and looked beautiful. “Before I add the finishing touches on this marvelous canvas, let’s clean up the mess we’ve made.” I took the strongest chemicals I had in the house, ammonia and bleach. “Bleach to whiten the impurities. You have so many of them.” I poured the bleach on her blood-flooded body. “Ammonia, for that strong tingly sensation. The tingling means it’s working.” I then poured three gallons of ammonia on her body. I heard screams and could almost feel the pain. “Now the painting is complete,” I said as I looked into her eyes. The chemicals reddened them and I saw the pain and suffering. So, I said to her, “Don’t look at me in such a way! You said you loved me, LOVE is not meant to be tampered with, you fool. We were so happy together. I kept my part of the bargain, I will love you until death do us part. And guess what, sweetheart? I still love you. Moreover, death did us part. Any last words my dear?” She looked at me and said, “I love you, too. I don’t hate you for this.” I wanted the slowest death ever possible. Therefore I dropped another bit of ammonia in her mouth and held her mouth and nose until she swallowed. “Do not worry, you will look as beautiful in death as you did in life.” After
that I walked away and drove my car to the nearest police station. By the
way, I still have her picture… Untitled
Untitled Jealousy rises inside me,
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